[edit: Firstly I have to say that this was written while I've had both parents, 3 babies and 2 cousins all interupt me over the space of 4 hours. So, this might not be the best post I've ever made. I do appreciate your comments, and can only apologise in advance. Once my parents stop "just wanting to see what I'm up to" i might be able to read it in a oner and see where mistakes have been made.]
Or, as we call it, the games women play...
Sadly my friend won't let me use his example, so I'll use my own, even if it's not as brilliant.
I met her in a bar, almost 4 years ago. After a somewhat brief conversation I asked if she'd like to go out sometime. She'd said No, but kept on talking anyway. At the end of the conversation (about one minute later - tops), she said “well, it was nice to meet you, shame we can't do it again sometime”.
So I asked again; and she said No. She grabbed her coat, grabbed her friends, then came round to say the goodbyes to the group I was in. At me, she stopped, smiled and said “If you take my number you can ask me out again sometime”. So I did.
I called her a couple of times, a few texts etc. and after two weeks or so she invited me out to her Birthday; where she proceeded to go home with someone else. Next day, she sends some texts, I told her that her Birthday wasn't great for me, and that I was wanitng to see her on a one-on-one actual date and she said No. So, I left it at that.
5 days later, she called me and asked why I'd stopped calling her. Upon explanation, she said “you've only asked me out 3 times, I'm not going to give in that easily”.
Does that make sense to any of you women? Cos it doesn't make sense to one man out there. Now, agreed, the lady in question was a bit... special – but come on!!
If a woman asks a man out, he'll either say Yes or No. Infact, he'll probably say Yes, as long as there are no other women he's got his eye on present. A man's attitude is, it might go somewhere, it might not, i'll give it a try. If a man asks a woman out, we've no idea what's going on. If a woman turns down a man, what does she mean? We've narrowed down what a woman means when she says no to teh following list:
1 No
2 No, we've not been talking long enough
3 No, try harder
4 No, I'm interested in someone else
5 No, I've seen you talking to other women, you might have asked them out too
6 No, Ask me at the end of the night or when you're leaving
7 No, I haven't decided whether I want to or not
8 No, maybe
9 No, but I'm a woman and sometimes NO means Yes
10 Maybe
A NO from a woman, can mean so many things. We men have no idea. If you want to let a man down gently, then be honest. You don't need to come up with any of the crap you've listed on my comments. If a man asks a woman out and she says something daft (like the 'cult' excuse) then he'll just think you're stalling. He'll think ”I've not had a REAL NO” and keep trying.
If a man asks you out and you want to say NO, may I suggest saying, “NO, I'm sorry, I'm really not interested. I already have a fuck buddy that's great, and if I was to see someone else It'd have to be someone really special. I appreciate the offer, but my life is really great right now, and I'm happy.”
Now, he'll probably try to change your mind He's NOT specifically being a sleazy git, he's just trying to test whether the NO is actually option 1 or is it any of options 2-10. If he tries more than you'd like and your NO was really a NO, say “Mate, take the hint, I'd hate for the other girls here to see you being so desperate.”.
BAM. He's backing off!
And not one mention of a cult (Kathrin). God Dam, you women are so much work...
